I Didn't Feel Like Running, But Bjork & The Cure Inspired Me
When my alarm went off at 5:30 this morning, I didn't feel like getting up to run. I didn't feel like getting up to do anything. I just wanted to pull the covers over my head and go back to sleep. A little voice in my head said, "Why get up? You can always go run six miles later."
I know, this is how folks end up weighing 300 pounds, isn't it? But this morning I did not care! Screw trying to make my skinny jeans (which aren't all that skinny by LA standards anyway) fit more loosely! Screw getting another marathon medal!
Yeah, I was not feeling it mentally. And physically I was definitely NOT feeling it. On my left foot, my heel has been hurting all week (no idea why) and my little toe has been killing me since last Monday night when someone I'm married to left the vacuum cleaner in a doorway because, "You told me to sweep up that cereal the kids spilled!" --and I stubbed my toe on it. HARD!
What else? I woke up with a headache. OMG, I'm getting old and my body is falling apart!
All good reasons to stay home, right? So I hit the snooze button three more times. But I guess I should give myself credit for not turning my alarm all the way off. If I had, and I'd gone back to sleep completely, I never would've heard another voice in my head, say, "Who are you kidding? Get up and get your trifling a** out the door!"
I felt like a pissy, rebellious child as I put my running gear on, drank some Earl Grey tea and headed out the door. The whole drive out to Santa Monica, I kept thinking, "I don't feel like running. Why'd I decide I want to run another marathon anyway?"
I figured I'd psych myself up by turning on the satellite radio -- XM channel 80 -- and there was Pete Tong's cheery voice telling me about some awesome remix. I was in such a bad mood I actually said out loud, "I hate you, Pete Tong!"
Why did I not turn the car around? Because I've realized that in these moments, it's alright for me to recognize that yes, I'm in a bad mood, and I may not feeling so great physically, but I can still get out there and at least try to run. And I have a rule that I have to stick it out at least a mile because I tend to feel a little cranky and not "together" for the first mile even on my best days.
Today I felt like crap for the first TWO miles. No kidding, I only kept going because of the peer pressure of not wanting to quit in front of everyone in my running club.
Yeah, I have issues. Need more proof? The inspirational turning point in my run was when this awesome mashup of Bjork and The Cure popped up on my iPod.
I started feeling really good about 20 seconds into the song... and so I listened to it five more times in a row.
I apologize to anybody in my group, and to any other people running in Santa Monica this morning, if you heard me wailing out loud, "We go to the hidden place..."
Before I knew it, a couple more miles had passed and I was almost finished! So thank you, Bjork! Thank you, Robert Smith and the rest of your Cure homies!
I know, this is how folks end up weighing 300 pounds, isn't it? But this morning I did not care! Screw trying to make my skinny jeans (which aren't all that skinny by LA standards anyway) fit more loosely! Screw getting another marathon medal!
Yeah, I was not feeling it mentally. And physically I was definitely NOT feeling it. On my left foot, my heel has been hurting all week (no idea why) and my little toe has been killing me since last Monday night when someone I'm married to left the vacuum cleaner in a doorway because, "You told me to sweep up that cereal the kids spilled!" --and I stubbed my toe on it. HARD!
What else? I woke up with a headache. OMG, I'm getting old and my body is falling apart!
All good reasons to stay home, right? So I hit the snooze button three more times. But I guess I should give myself credit for not turning my alarm all the way off. If I had, and I'd gone back to sleep completely, I never would've heard another voice in my head, say, "Who are you kidding? Get up and get your trifling a** out the door!"
I felt like a pissy, rebellious child as I put my running gear on, drank some Earl Grey tea and headed out the door. The whole drive out to Santa Monica, I kept thinking, "I don't feel like running. Why'd I decide I want to run another marathon anyway?"
I figured I'd psych myself up by turning on the satellite radio -- XM channel 80 -- and there was Pete Tong's cheery voice telling me about some awesome remix. I was in such a bad mood I actually said out loud, "I hate you, Pete Tong!"
Why did I not turn the car around? Because I've realized that in these moments, it's alright for me to recognize that yes, I'm in a bad mood, and I may not feeling so great physically, but I can still get out there and at least try to run. And I have a rule that I have to stick it out at least a mile because I tend to feel a little cranky and not "together" for the first mile even on my best days.
Today I felt like crap for the first TWO miles. No kidding, I only kept going because of the peer pressure of not wanting to quit in front of everyone in my running club.
Yeah, I have issues. Need more proof? The inspirational turning point in my run was when this awesome mashup of Bjork and The Cure popped up on my iPod.
I started feeling really good about 20 seconds into the song... and so I listened to it five more times in a row.
I apologize to anybody in my group, and to any other people running in Santa Monica this morning, if you heard me wailing out loud, "We go to the hidden place..."
Before I knew it, a couple more miles had passed and I was almost finished! So thank you, Bjork! Thank you, Robert Smith and the rest of your Cure homies!
Comments
And I like your rule about sticking it out for the first mile -- I don't run, but that seems like it could work for other things too. Hehe, like any of the work I do. Could be that I have to give it a good 15 minutes of effort, and then get myself sorted out if I haven't gotten into the groove by then. Hmm...
You are a hero for getting in your car and driving to the beach. Let alone six miles. Yes!!
Isnt' it amazing how much music can affect a run? Sometimes I feel like I am gonna give up and then just the right song pops up on the ipod and I get all inspired and keep going. I love me some Cure and Bjork - gotta add them to the playlist.
I learned that rule from an exercise book and it DOES apply to lots of things. I've learned that it applies to writing as well. If I commit to doing at least 15 minutes, I can come up with something!
Claudia,
Whew, I give you kudos for running in that frosty chill. I have a hard time running in very hot weather. Haven't had to try the cold!
Kristen,
Yay for you training for your 1st 5K! I love the couch potato to 5K program for that. It really helped me.
Music makes such a huge difference. Some folks say it's bad to run with it but it really keeps me going.