When Crazy People And Starbucks Collide

It's been a rainy week here in Los Angeles and I'm exhausted - and in need of sleep and a winning lottery ticket. I have a feeling neither one is coming my way any time soon so the next best option is obtaining a venti Earl Grey with two tea bags.

This morning I headed to the closest Starbucks to my job to get my tea. Turns out it's one of those Starbucks inside a grocery story - which is fine. I'm in there a couple times a week so when they see me walk in they make my Earl Grey for me and have it ready at the counter.

I'm talking to the barista about the rain and how we'll take that over the fires we usually have at this time of year. For some reason, when I swiped my card to pay, the card reader wouldn't read it. The barista says, "Hmm... I guess it's acting up again. We were having problems with it last night."

The heffa behind me says, "I hate it when broke people try to act surprised when their card gets declined."

Jesus take my name and number and put me down in your book because I did not even turn around. What could I possibly say? "This is an A & B conversation so C your way out!"

I don't know if she hadn't had her morning fix of coffee or what, but I have learned that you never know what kind of craziness is going on with people, so when they decide to show out in public, it's best to leave them alone.

I minded my business while the barista pushed buttons and finally said to me, "Try your card again."

Stop The Insanity behind me blurts out, "Why bother? It's just going to get declined!"

I couldn't help myself. I turned around and looked her dead in her eye with my "I will wipe the floor with you if you don't shut up" look for a full ten seconds. I didn't say anything. I just looked at her till she looked away. Then I turned back around, swiped my card - the machine worked - and then picked up my tea.

While I was doctoring it up with sugar and a hint of cream, guess what happened to Psycho? Oh, the machine stopped working on her too!

What goes around comes around!


Jameil said…
I just put a little word in for you with the good Lord!!!! OH NO SHE DIDN'T!!!!! You are so right about the crazies because I've had days where I was one but FOR REAL!?!? She tried your life, son!! Saint Los Angelista. I am kirking out in my head right now!!
Remnants of U said…
LOL! I saw the title & just had to hold off on running errands to read it. Yep, she almost got what she deserved... :-)
Michael Morgan said…
Karma is a sweet and fickle lady and she came back hard! LOVE this.
nick said…
You should have looked her in the eye and said to the barista "Don't you just hate it when some bum comes in with a stolen credit card and what d'you know it doesn't work...."
Anonymous said…
You have such style, my dear friend. I am glad you're on my side and I'm on yours.
Liz Dwyer said…
Yes she did! Fortunately, today's visit was much more civilized. In and out and now I'm drinking my tea in peace. (Gosh, Earl Grey is so bitter sometimes! I love it! ;)

Yes she sure did...although since it was raining, it might've been nice if a lighting bolt had come thru the door and slapped her on my behalf.

It was the best thing when the machine wouldn't work for her either. LOVED IT!

Ha! That would've been funny. But I was in such a mood yesterday, I needed to keep my mouth shut. I think I would've said very mean things.

Always glad to be on your team. I feel less than stylish these days. Feel like a zombie.
1969 said…
Taking a deep breath for you. Karma is a bytch. LOL
Liz, you are a better woman than I because I would have had to say something to the ugly bitch. Even though I know better. Even though I know the power of stink-eye. Even though my mama would be turning in her grave. But vindication is sweet!

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