My Brother Would've Been 48 Today
Today would've been my brother's 48th birthday. I think of him as being 48-years-old, not as 41-years-old, the age he was when he took his life.
I don't do this kind of adding on years with other relatives. I always remember my grandmother's birthday but I don't calculate her age as being whatever age she'd be now.
It's tempting to think that it's a sign that I haven't quite accepted that he's gone from this world...but I don't think that's true. Although there is such a finality to death for our bodies, I don't believe this is the end for our souls.
Indeed, I've long been fascinated by the idea that our souls are like phoenixes, rising from the mortal ashes of this physical world, only to emerge renewed and reborn in the spiritual world that awaits us. That's what I always hope for him--that his soul is blazing and alive.