Having the Sex Talk
Mr. T asks, "Did we come out all covered in blood like that?"
"Why yes, you did."
"Eww. That's gross."
"Well, yeah, but that's what happens when babies are born." And that's not the half of it, but he's only 8 so we don't need to get into all the graphic details.
"It makes me glad I'm not a woman so I don't have to have a bloody baby come out of ME," said Mr. T.
"Well, you will have to be extra loving and helpful to your wife when she has one coming out." Or else.
"Eww. That means I'd have to have IT. Ewwwww. Gross." He started writhing in his chair and making disgusted faces.
I was genuinely confused. "No, you don't give birth to the baby. Your wife does."
"EWW! I KNOW THAT! But ewwwww. I'd have to have IT."
I was still confused. He already knows the mom has the baby. "Have what?"
"I can't tell you."
"Just tell me."
"It's gross. I can't. And I'm never having a wife."
"You don't want a wife? Of course you want a wife."
"No I don't. I'm not doing that."
"But you don't have the baby! Your wife does!"
"FINE! I'd have to have S-E-X to have a baby. That's gross." And then, in a small voice, "And I don't think I'll like it. And my wife might not like it either because then she'll have to have the gross bloody baby."
"Oh, really," I laughed. "I think she'll like it."
"Well I won't," he declared. "I'm never having sex." And then he shook his fist at me. "EVER."
Clearly, as open and upfront--and age appropriate--about sex as I am with Mr. T, there is still a looong way to go. In the meantime, I don't think I can stop laughing.