The Pagina Monologues

Did you know that girls have paginas?

According to my 7-year-old son Mr. T, every girl has a pagina. Boys have a penis and girls have a pagina. And my other son, 10-year-old Mr. O doesn't want to talk about ANY of it.

So, last night, Mr. T asks, "Mom, what do girls have instead of a penis?"

I'm all about honesty in body parts so I reminded him, "A vagina."

"Oh yeah, a pagina. That's what it's called."

Clearly I hadn't enunciated enough...or maybe the TV was up too loud, but this boy heard "pagina".

While I chuckled to myself over Mr. T mishearing me, and Mr. T was saying to himself, "Pagina...that's weird!", his older brother was not so enthusiastic about all the pagina talk.

Mr. O put his fingers in his ears and sang, "Lalalalala! I'm not listening. I'm 10 and you're grossing me out talking about girl private parts!"

But, never one to miss the chance to correct his little brother, in the next breath, and with ears still plugged with his fingers, Mr. O added, "and it's VAGINA, not 'pagina.
'"

Now I have one son who's traumatized over having to correct the other over the correct pronunciation of vagina, and the other is probably at school right this very minute repeating pagina or vagina over and over again. AWESOME!

Comments

nick said…
Pagina is the Italian for page, so perhaps you could explain to Mr T that he's got the wrong language.
Liz Dwyer said…
Nick,
Ha! I love it. Oh, you just made me laugh out loud for real!
BSQUARED86 said…
Cutest thing ever!
Liz Dwyer said…
Bsquared86,
I know. This is one of those moments that cracks me up as a parent...And so far, no call from the school!
Joy said…
Classic
Liz Dwyer said…
Joy,
Yep, moments like this--this is the kind of stuff I'll remember when I'm old and they're totally grown up.
Dirty Red said…
Well at least your boys are coming to you with stuff like this...
I had to go talk to my little man's Principle a while back, because him and one of his "homies" decided to compare their we-we sizes in the back of the class one day to see which one was the biggest.
When I got his little ass home and asked him WTF was wrong with him, he said that he saw me getting out of the shower one day and he told his friend about it and he bet him that his daddy's was not as big as me..One thing led to another and what did they decide to do? Compare each other's. I couldn't do nothing but laugh after he told me that shyte, but I still whooped his little behind.
Kids...What can you do with em?
Anonymous said…
One of the funniest and more endearing things that I've read in a while. Can't imagine when I was a kid discussing 'paginas' and such things with my mom back in the day. Your kids are blessed.
Liz Dwyer said…
Dirty Red,
Hahaha! I think I love your little boy...but I can't even IMAGINE the trouble he got in at school. I can just see the look on his teacher's face...lol!

Ian,
I can't imagine discussing paginas with my mom at that age either, and I,er, have one!
Daenel T. said…
LOL Too funny. My oldest explained the birds and the bees to the younger ones, how did I find out? While driving, my youngest asks "Mommy, what color were our eggs?" Hahahaha

Popular Posts