Starbucks Lesson 187: Don't Ask Who I Voted For!

I proudly wore my "I voted" sticker all day yesterday. When I switched jackets later in the afternoon, I noticed it was losing it's ability to stick so I put a little piece of tape on the back of it so I could continue to sport it all night.

It's still stuck to the jacket I have on this morning, but I'd forgotten all about it's presence. At least, until the blond woman in front of me in a very long line at Starbucks interrupted my daydreams by saying, "Wow, you still have on your "I voted" sticker."

I am, as I noted yesterday, a very excited, proud voter so I was all smiles when I replied, "Oh, I guess I do! I wore this jacket yesterday."

She nodded her head and then snidely asked, "Who'd you go for? Obama?"

First of all, I'm sorry, but folks should know better than to flat out ask people who they voted for. That's just rude. I don't know you and you are not an exit poller. And even if you were, I'm not telling you who I voted for!

Second of all, I'm at Starbucks for crying out loud! I'm just there to get my chai and be out. And doesn't she know it's dangerous to talk to people at Starbucks in the morning? Most of them have not had their caffeine fix and they will snap at you in a heartbeat if you even look at them funny!

Finally, why was she assuming that I voted for Obama? Last time I checked, there are a whole gang of folks still running for the Presidency.

Let me make some "assumptions" back about her. I doubt she assumed this because she believes Obama's so darn awesome and she thinks everybody should vote for him. Nope, she was looking at my skin color and thinking that because it's similar to Barack Obama's that he automatically got my vote.

Who cares about issues or anything like that. If I'm black, I must just love Barack Obama because, well, he's black too. Black people don't care about anything else, right? We don't care about Iraq even though we've got sons, daughters and cousins over there fighting. We don't care about education even though our children disproportionately go to jacked up, failing schools. And we don't care about the economy either even though unemployment rates for black men are ridiculous. No, we're not thinking about any of that stuff. We just wanna see a black man in the White House so we can say we've arrived and Dr. King's dream has finally been realized.

Whatever.

How does she know I'm not one of the over 166,000 California idiots who voted for John Edwards even though he isn't even in the race anymore? And don't get me started on the folks who still voted for Kucinich! Hello! Vote for someone who's still actually running next time, m'kay?

Why be so quick to assume a black woman didn't vote for Hillary Clinton? Maya Angelou loves Hillary Clinton. Maybe I love Maya and therefore love Hillary by extension. And let's not forget about how Hillary was the first black First Lady since her husband was the first black President. Neither one have ever had the experience of trying to catch a cab while black, but that's just semantics, right?

If I'm not for Hillary, maybe I'm wearing John McCain t-shirts when I sleep at night. Maybe I've contributed hundreds of dollars to his campaign because I admire all he's tried to do for campaign finance reform.

And how come she thinks I'm not enamored with Mitt Romney? I mean, I might get sold on Mitt Romney just because I think his campaign press secretary, Kevin Madden, is pretty hot! I mean, Kevin's a nice Irish boy (score ten twenty points right there) and if votes were cast solely on how fly the press secretaries are, well, Mitt Romney beats the other campaigns hands down, no recount needed.

So I decided to mess with Miss Rude Starbucks Know-It-All a little bit.

"No, I didn't vote for Barack Obama," I replied. "Did you vote for him?"

Her face totally lit up and she began to gush. "You didn't vote for... Gosh, you voted for Hillary? I totally thought... Well, I did too! I'm so relieved she won California."

I nodded my head and smiled as she talked. She gave me a conspiratorial grin back as she continued. "It looked sort of scary there for a minute with Maria Shriver and Oprah both backing Barack."

And that's when I dropped my mischievous bomb on her. "Oh I didn't vote for Hillary Clinton. I voted for Ron Paul."

The look on her face was priceless! I thought her head was gonna spin around like she was Linda Blair in "The Exorcist"!

"Oh. Ron Paul. That's an interesting choice," was all she could say.

Yeah, real "interesting".

"Yes, I think he's a new hope for a new generation," I said. I thought my head was going to explode from holding both my anger and my laughter in, but I kept going. "Every time he talks. I just feel so inspired, moved to tears even."

She began to look down as I spoke.

I gave her the clincher. "I know he won't win, but I just love the man!"

She fumbled in her bag, grabbed her cell phone and said, "Oh sorry, I have a call." Then she turned away and began talking into her phone.

Hah hah! Was she faking a cell phone conversation just to get away from talking to yours truly, the black, female, Ron Paul supporter?

Regardless, I hope next time she'll think twice before assuming who voted for certain candidates and then asking people who they voted for.

It's just not polite and besides, she might run into crazy people like moi who will say equally off the wall things just to deal with the wackness being shoveled my way.

Comments

ha!

Hello, Kevin Madden is hot and that is not how I usually roll. You have great taste.
none said…
That's funny. My post yesterday dealt with the same issue of someone assuming who I was voting for by the way I look.

Hell The Ron Paul vote isn't a bad idea. at least I'll have something to talk about in line at starbucks :)
Jameil said…
lmao!!! didn't even know who Kevin Madden was before reading this but OH MY WORD!! hello hot press sec!! lol. don't get me started on why i like obama but her impertinence was certainly outrageous!!
Liz Dwyer said…
NYC/CR,
Very easy on the eyes, isn't he? First time I saw him on TV, I was like, "Wowzer!"

Hammer,
Well you know, every thing I've heard Ron Paul say in the debates has made a ton of sense to me. He strikes me as someone who at least tells the truth and isn't all over the place in his beliefs. It does strike me as very unfair that MSNBC and CNN have excluded him from debates recently. That's just wrong.
Liz Dwyer said…
Jameil,
Girl, I swear my TV smokes when Kevin Madden is on it!!! I wonder if he's single... some of you single ladies that work in TV should investigate!

Yeah, I could go on for days about how amazing Obama is, but why waste it on that woman when she's assuming I like him for all the wrong reasons?
Jen said…
It absolutely amazes me how rude some people can be.

You absolutely cracked me up, though. And I agree, every time Ron Paul opens his mouth, I want to cry. ;-)
Jen said…
BTW... I didn't see your comment to Hammer and I agree that it's wrong to exclude Paul from the debates. And yes, he doesn't flip flop. But some of the things he says still make me want to cry.
Liz Dwyer said…
Jen,
I know! But at least we know he means what he says, right? LOL!
jOoLz said…
i'm thinking a whole lot of those ballots cast for edwards were of the absentee variety, and were sent in before he quit.
Liz Dwyer said…
Joolz,
Good point. I hadn't thought about that. Do they even start counting absentee that quickly?
Mes Deux Cents said…
Hi Liz,

You should start taking a hidden camera when you go to cafes.

You would end-up with an award winning documentary. :)

On absentee ballots; I think they should not allow people to send them in until the day of the vote.

I bet a lot of people have changed their minds since they mailed their ballot.
Unknown said…
Stop making me laugh out loud! You're going to get me fired!!
No, but seriously, you got her real good! Girlfriend totally had the fake call syndrome. I agree with Mes Deux Cents, you need a video camera!
the joy said…
Did you use 187 on purpose? Lol. I would have messed with her nutty lil head too. I hate that people assume that I voted for him cuz he's black. That's what I call a bonus.
Anonymous said…
This guy went through something similar to you. He was grilled, though.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kica8hmSdAM
Anonymous said…
Here's an interesting clip of Kevin Madden poking fun at his appearance.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=h5CtLhyOpc4
Lisa Johnson said…
That was hilarious! I bought chai at Starbucks today too. There was a long line and I kept looking at people wondering which ones voted for Romney and Clinton! I didn't dare say a thing though!
Unknown said…
I stay away from Starbuck's these days. I don't like to, but it a necessity. I like the maple oat scones too much. And the little vanilla ones. Do people only eat one of those, really? I guess those people are normal. I ain't.

LMAO! Right on, right on, like we used say during the days of sizzler skirts, six inch platform boots and dancing on "The Good Foot"! Liz, tell folks about it. Make no assumptions; folks might have to pick their face up off the floor, like homechick. Uh, oh...lapsing into the old Angela. I better stop because it's startin' to get good to me! :)
Anonymous said…
Here in Belfast, it's difficult to get any clear picture of what the different candidates' policies are and who would be the best president. The media focus is always on personalities and whether Hillary might burst into tears again. I'm always amazed that you all stay interested in the presidential hoo-ha for so long. Over here we have a three-week campaign for the general election and that's it. Even that seems over-long.
Nerd Girl said…
Touche! It amazes me that people continue to ask questions they shouldn't and then have nerve to get all "shame faced" when you flip the script on them. Good job!

@ Nick - I for one, am tired of the hooha and would love a 3 week campaign!
Liz Dwyer said…
MDC,
I've always secretly wanted to make a documentary. Or maybe my true destiny is to write a feature film centered around a cafe? ;)

We want instant gratification too much to be able to only send in absentee ballots the day of. If we did that, the pundits wouldn't be able to "call" an election ten seconds after the polls close.

Houseonahill.org,
I wish her phone would've started ringing right when she began fake talking on it. Gosh, I can't even imagine how awesome that would've been. She probably thought I was a total nut and that's just so fantastic that she did.

The Joy,
I sure did use it on purpose. I make myself laugh about it by being sarcastic in my post, but I was really annoyed by her question and her comments. It was just such a sign of an overhyped sense of superiority. Okay, I'm getting all heated again over it. What's the song say? "And you don't stop, 'cause it's 1-8-7..."

Jstele,
Oh he's good! He knows his stuff, doesn't he? I think the interviewer got nicer after he said his dad is a pediatrician. To me, that's when the interviewer's tone changed. Oh and that Kevin Madden clip is so funny! At least it shows he doesn't take himself too seriously in the looks department! Thanks for sharing!

Anali,
I think chai is one of the best inventions the human race has ever come up with. It's especially good with a shot of sugar free vanilla.

I had a couple of other conversations yesterday where folks danced around outright asking me. I know they were dying to know. I just wonder how many people I know voted, period.

Angela,
They have these awesome cupcakes at the ones in LA now and it's really hard to resist them but I just tell myself that one cupcake equals dessert for like three days. I like some of their muffins but when you go on the website and read the calorie and fat counts, well, that ends my cravings! :) I just

Nick
THREE WEEKS??? Wowzer, that's efficient! You have to go to the candidate's websites and download long PDFs with their stances on various issues. Or, some people I know have taken online quizzes to see which candidate they line up with. I am also tired of stories over who raised what $ and who cried. They don't discuss issues on the news. This race is too long. To think they've been campaigning for a year now and it's going to probably continue all the way up to the convention in August. Ugh!

Nerd Girl,
I want to blame it on tabloid journalism where no question is off limits. Somehow it's TMZ's fault that folks just don't know when to not ask what they're dying to know!
Brianna said…
HILARIOUS!!!

The same thing bothers me...I vote as an American and as an American I believe Obama is the best choice. It's not like we are voting for Al Sharpton. (apologies to his supporters)
Aud Rey said…
Everyone from CNN and NY Times to political blogs to black blogs to women's blogs make the same assertions. It is insulting.

People should be voting for the candidate they think is best and focus less on making history. I as a black woman don't need to "pick a side." If Condoleeza Rice were running, I wouldn't vote for her so why on earth should I vote for Hillary because she's a woman or Obama because he's black? Are all women voting for Hillary because you have similar anatomy?

Gorgeous Black Women
Lola Gets said…
Girl, you almost made me cry with that "Ron Paul" comment, LOL!

And HOW could so many folks vote for a man who was no longer on the ballot?? Well, hopefully it was the absentees. I hope.

L
Anonymous said…
I just had this conversation on another blog. I'm a Black woman so I had the tough choice between the woman or the Black man. Jeeze! How insulting. Is that how "they" vote?
Liz Dwyer said…
Brianna,
I always wonder what kind of relaxer Al Sharpton uses. Is he a Mizani or a Dark & Lovely type of guy? Or is he still rocking the press-n-curl?

Gorgeous Black Woman,
The media is assuming that. I had to shut my TV off last night when I was watching some show where they were talking about black voters in Georgia. The discussion was insinuating that if 80% of black Georgians went for Barack, it was was only because he's also black. I guess we're suppose to believe that the 20% who did not vote for him were the only ones that looked at issues instead of skin color? Yeah, I'm tired of it. I mean, six months ago he wasn't black enough!

Lola,
Poor Ron Paul. Now that Romney's peaced out, I wonder what he's going to do. Will he quit as well?

I think folks try to "protest" vote but that never makes sense to me. If someone's not running, don't vote for them!

And another thought...Mr. Fly Press Secretary Kevin Madden is out of a job! :(

Jali,
I've heard that if all the candidates are white males, then folks just vote according to identification with hair and eye color. And if that doesn't work, they line up according to shoe size.

Okay, I'll stop, but it just shows how ridiculous it is to say that folks vote for Barack only because he's black.
I can't believe that people have such a hard time minding their own business! There is so much un-festered anger and resentment going around that folks just can't control themselves, even while going about their simple day to day activities! No wonder America is so violent! I think we all need a hug.

And let folks vote and walk around in peace, sheeyit!
Tafari said…
Off topic but I just tagged you. Sorry to continue the vicious blog cycle!!!

Bygbaby
Tafari said…
OK, I'm back & that story was funny. I am thinking that you need to say out of Starbucks fro a while. Well maybe not because you trips there make for good blogging!

Damn you got profiled like a mutha fucka! I would have done the same as you but maybe been like hell no bitch, I voted for Mitt Romney, you know I's a Negro Mormon. That would have surely fucked her up & maybe caused that head to spin!

I am pretty upset that MI residents did not get a chance to vote for their Democratic choice this time around. And if Billary gets those delegates, she will have a whole bunch of after her ass.

Bygbaby
Liz Dwyer said…
DMB,
There is a TON of anger in people these days! What happened in the USA today? Folks shooting up city council meetings in Missouri, a guy here in LA shot three people and a police officer... it's just crazy.

I'll give Starbucks girl the benefit of the doubt and guess that if she'd had her morning narcotic, she might have had more sense than to say the things she did.

Bygbaby,
Yeah! I haven't been tagged in a minute! And oh wow, I cannot leave a comment that makes any kind of sense now! Let me just fall out on the floor and laugh...
Anonymous said…
Liz -- I love your style.
Liz Dwyer said…
Mojan,
Thanks! I am thrilled to even read that someone thinks I have style!
ahahahahahahahahahahahaha

We still caucus in Colorado. Holy crap, what a mess. No privacy there - you raise your hand.

Yep.
the last noel said…
I tell people I wrote my own name in and voted for myself for president. Now, I can say that I ran against Obama and Clinton.
Liz Dwyer said…
Claudia,
That lack of privacy would really bug me. Peer pressure out of control.

Noel,
Now that's the best approach I've heard in awhile. I'm going to steal that next time someone gets the nerve to ask me.

Popular Posts