What I'm Laughing About Today.

It's such a beautiful day here in LA today that I feel compelled to share some of the things I'm laughing about today:

1) Kindergartners think they know it all. I was observing a classroom today and three of the girls were all, "How old are you?"

I put their question back to them. "How old do you think I am?"

One immediately replied back, "Seventeen."

Hmm...she must have been gunning for teacher's pet or something.

The other two girls disagreed with her response. "No, I think she's sixteen. No, eighteen."

I decided to burst their bubble. I leaned down and whispered, "Can you all keep a secret?"

They all nodded enthusiastically so I continued. "Well, I'm actually 34 years old."

Those girls faces gave new meaning to the phrase "shock and awe"...and one immediately let my secret out of the bag. She challenged my top-secret age by hollering at the top of her lungs, "You ain't no 34 years old! You're trying to trick us!" She then rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips, "I ain't no fool! You're seventeen!"

I'm still laughing two hours later.

2) Oh, Alanis, you're a genius! If you haven't seen Alanis Morrisette's take on "My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas, you absolutely must click on this link to watch. This is a better than anything Weird Al Yankovic could have ever done. It's the exact same lyrics as the original, exact same style of video. More than anything, it succeeds in proving once again how utterly stupid the original video, song and lyrics were: My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps". Someone give Alanis a medal for clowning this one, please.

3) Remind me, why am I taking this novel writing class? Oh yeah, because I want to write a novel. I am taking the class and it's tonight. I'm supposed to turn in 3-4 pages of ...something. I'm not exactly sure. The instructor was a little vague. Am I supposed to bring a character sketch? An opening scene? My instructions? "Whatever you feel like bringing."

Well, my overachieving self needs direction sometimes. In this class though, we didn't even talk through the syllabus. Tell me what to do, spell it out for me and then I'll push those boundaries. I just don't like feeling like I'm going to get the bad grade by showing up with something that's actually not wanted. I am prepared to get ripped to shreds this evening.

Oh wait, this was supposed to be about stuff that was making me laugh, right?

Clearly it's time to end this post and listen to some more of Fedde Le Grand's (best name ever!) remix of Camille Jones' "The Creeps". I was writing about this track last night on my other blog and I think a few spins on the iPod are just what I need to put me back into a happier frame of mind.

So tell me, what are you laughing about today?


Dena said…
i just saw this on npr's website:
regarding starting a novel :-)

and i don't have any funnies, yet.
none said…
I have my kids convinced that I'm 11. The think that they will be as big as me in a few years ;)
Anonymous said…
The my humps is absolutely brilliant. I've always adored Alanis though so I'm not surprised :)
Anonymous said…
Laughed about nothing today, beautiful one.

Broke down at the corner where I normally meet my kids, 'cause they weren't there. Crossed signals today.

...wow...i could use a good laugh. let me go chase that five-year-old with the threat of a fish-kiss ...
I'm laughing about this post. That's what I'm laughing about.
West said…
Those kids are too funny.

The Alanis thing caught me completely off-guard, when I heard it. I originally thought it was a joke by a Georgia radio station (where I was when I heard it).

I'm very curious about both, why she chose to do it AND why she was allowed to, by Fergie.

By the way, do any of you remember "Kids Incorporated," the show with the singing and dancing kids? Well, Fergie was the little blonde girl.

Gawd, this is turning into a full post, but I wanted to answer your question.

I'm not laughing about much, but I'm feeling secure about a purchase I made last night. Peace-of-mind is awesome.
Liz Dwyer said…
The link won't work! But guess what, I cranked my pages out in a couple of hours and it was generally received positively. Whew. Now I have to keep going. I'd love to post some of my story, but I don't want my ideas jacked!

LOL. My eldest knows I'm 34. He'll tell my age to strangers too. "I'm 6. My mom is 34." Gotta love it!

Isn't that video great? I really wonder what Fergie thinks about it.

I have those days too. Quite often. Today I'm laughing about how I can only chew on one side of my mouth because I have to get the fillings on my cavities adjusted. It hurts to bite on the left side...but sometimes I forget and chomp down on a pretzel. OUCH! I can laugh now because I am getting it fixed on Friday. Otherwise, I probably wouldn't think it was so funny. Hope today is good for you.

Glad to make you laugh a little! :)
Liz Dwyer said…
I want to know the same things about the Alanis video. I wonder, if she doesn't release it commercially, would she even need permission?

I remember Kids Inc. and wowzer, I was so sad when the Peas put her in the group. I always wonder if the other two guys other than will.i.am really like her.

And what did you buy last night? NyQuil?
Jameil said…
kindergartners crack me up! one asked me once if i was 13. when i said no, i was 23, she also gasped then told me i was lying AND asked my father for confirmation. then i started thinking WHAT?! am i really that old????

making me laugh today: field's post about white people and their dogs. youtube. also

"tj: My lipgloss is cool. My lipgloss be poppin. Just thought you should know.

Lauren: I love that ignorant ass song!

tj: Sure is ignorant. Or maybe our lipgloss is on that bull.

Lauren: Lmao! Whatever. My lipgloss be poppin', at my locker after school all the boys be stoppin', lmao

tj: I just feel too 23 for that song. Although my flavor rush makes everything glittery. And it tastes like cupcakes!

Lauren: Lol! Yep. That sounded reeeaaaaal 23, lol

tj: Lol. That was kinda silly huh? It was the gloss talking.

Lauren: Lil bit, lol. Damn lipgloss getting the best of you.

tj: Must resist!"
Sundry said…
The AM video sure made me laugh. Whoot! The first time I heard the original song, they were doing it live at something like 9am for The Today Show. Talk about a strange venue.

Did you check out the Walter Mosley interview about writing that Noel linked on his blog? It's terrific. Very good advice. (I think I also linked it on my Sunday post/writing ramble.)

Glad to hear you are working on a novel.
Great post!

What am I laughing at?

I'm laughing at myself.

I have two sons, neither of school age, yet. This morning as I was making breakfast, I found myself walking towards my living room. A pillow from the sofa went flying into the wall from a part of the room I couldn't see.

My oldest was in the ideal spot to have thrown it. I asked, "Why'd you throw that pillow?" He replied, "I didn't throw it."

"Oh yeah," I replied, "Who did?"

"Nobody." He replied.

Now I'm getting miffed. "Don't tell me a story! Did you or your brother throw it?"

By now he looked worried and he said, "Nobody threw it. I kicked it."

I have to admit that it was so hard for me not to bust out laughing that I frowned at him and quickly walked away back to the kitchen!

I was rollin'.
Liz Dwyer said…
My lip gloss be poppin'! Oh that's hilarious! I'm laughing just reading that.

Can you imagine Matt Lauer's face during that "performance"? And I did get the link from Noel's blog and checked it out. It's good advice...which I clearly need. I'm glad I'm working on the novel too. It's about time I get myself in gear.

Oh that's funny and I can totally relate. There are plenty of things that my kids say where I have to just put my head in my lap. (pretending I'm crying because they are being dishonest) My youngest son tries to tell me that "Batman did it". The eldest just gets all drama and blames his little brother.
Anonymous said…
Childsplay x2 just wrote a post about using the bathroom and how as parents we have lost our right to use the bathroom indpendantly, at least we've lost that right until those lil aliens realize that boo boo really does stink and there is no reason to endure oneself through it. But I have the most adorable picture of my husband and daughter using the potty at the same time. Him on the big throne and her on her mini throne!!
the last noel said…
There is NOOOOOO way that anyone will think I'm seventeen. May twenty-one? Ugh, even I know that's pushing it.

Oh, about your novel class? Careful or you might be reported as a potetial pyscho.
Liz Dwyer said…
Yes, my youngest is thankfully just starting to grasp that there's a such thing as privacy.

Those kinder kids would probably be thinking you're 15, not 17. They seriously have no perspective. Anyone over the age of 10 seems old to them. And, you'll be happy to know I've temporarily abandoned my little pyromaniac story. There are other tales to tell, thankfully, because that was just depressing. Regardless, I'm sure Mr. Francis may be well on his way to thinking I'm a psycho!
velvet said…
That was so cute about those kindergarteners!

Hmmm, not much in my life that's funny today. Oh, well.
Junk Monkey said…
Sorry but I think the Black Eye Peas one was funny in the first place. What's the point of parodying a joke?
Liz Dwyer said…
I hope today brings more funny things to your life...I could ship my youngest off to you and have him do his naked rendition of "Smells Like Teen Spirit". That will have you on the floor in stitches.

True. But Fergie and crew took it so seriously that I don't think they really got how ridiculous it was in the first place.

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