A Billion People Watched That Snooze-Fest?

Unfortunately, I was one of them.

Was it just me or did the Oscar's seem like a big snooze-fest to you too? Goodness, now I know why everyone takes apart the fashions...it's because the show is sooo darn boring.

I started zoning out after Marky Mark didn't win Best Supporting Actor for his performance in The Departed. I thought he was really good in that movie. Plus, I was hoping he'd win because I thought he might get up there and give us a quick rendition of "Good Vibrations" just for old times sake. Maybe he'd pull the Funky Bunch up there too and bust out with some old school moves. But no, didn't happen.

What else did happen? Yes, black people represented and got some more awards. We're just on a roll here with black actors and actresses winning at the Oscars. Depending on where you stand, you either think this is the result of the Antichrist's coming or you're thrilled and you're pumping your black power fist in the air. Well, actually, you might be somewhere in between those extremes but if you had no choice, which side would you be on? Option A: Black Power. Option B: The Antichrist.

Option B? You're at the wrong blog so have a nice life.

But, if you picked Option A, let's see what you're celebrating:

First of all, Jennifer Hudson won Best Supporting Actress for Dreamgirls. I still haven't seen the movie and I think I'll wait till it's on dvd. I don't know why I'm just not that into it. Good for Jennifer though that her little Cinderella story is tied up with a nice, neat Oscar statue. It was cute how she thanked Jennifer Holiday at the end of her acceptance speech. But, she'd better watch her back because look out world, it's gonna be time for some serious media destruction. After all, you know how our media loves to build someone up only so they can take them down. Yep, she's a prime target.

With Jennifer, I doubt we'll get crotch shots or pictures of her in a threesome smoking crack. Instead, the questions I can see coming are, "Did she really deserve the Oscar? Can Jennifer act in a movie that doesn't require her to belt out a song?" Actually I think that's sort of a legitimate question.

We can also prepare for some comments about her really needing to go on a diet. Next thing you know, there'll be eBay auctions of her alleged Oscar night girdle.

Yep, at her size, I'm not so sure what we'll see Jennifer cast in next because neither she (nor I) have Reese Witherspoon's barely there, much admired, lollipop-head body. Jennifer's a big woman and all that mess about celebrating healthy bodies doesn't mean a thing in Hollywood. I'll give it to her that she looked good, but for a minute there when she was performing, I thought her ta-tas were going to pop right out of that skintight red dress.

And then there was Forest Whittaker winning Best Actor. I really try, but for the life of me, I cannot figure out what the man is saying when he opens his mouth. The end of his speech where he was thanking his ancestors and all that...it sounded sort of good, but I just couldn't follow it. I do want to see his movie though. Someone I was talking to today said it was one of the best films of the past decade.

So, tomorrow folks will get their dresses, hair and makeup ripped to shreds. I'd hate to be one of those actresses that gets labelled worst dressed. I can just hear someone asking me what I'm wearing every day when I go out. That would be pretty tiresome. Today I'd have to tell them, "Black boots by 9West, jeans by Jeanstar and black turtleneck by...um, did I get this at Target?"

I suppose I'm just further proof that someone can live in LA, only two miles from the Kodak Theatre, and be a million miles from the glitz and glitter of Hollywood...but I obviously wasted four hours of my life watching the show waiting for something exciting to happen.

Oh wait, maybe the Antichrist does have a hand in this?

Comments

Mamita Umita said…
Yes - boring. At least you were on west coast time. I had to stay up until 11:30 to see who won Best Picture. I did like Ellen as the host, but something seemed very BLAH about it this year. Maybe it was the nominees? The presenters? I did love the dresses though - lots of color and glitz last night.
West said…
I don't watch. Too long. Too dull. And too disappointing.

Hudson sang the hell out of her song, but I don't know that her acting was all that great.

I don't recall who the other nominees were, but I try to remember that there's really no such thing as an Oscar-worthy performance - not in practice, anyway.

You don't have to be great. You just have to be greater than the other folks from that year... and sometimes not even that.
Liz Dwyer said…
Mamita,
Yeah, Ellen was pretty good as a host but it was blah. It almost felt like everybody was trying too hard...which is probably the truth since you get trashed in the press if you aren't parfait. I loved Helen Mirren's dress. I wouldn't mind looking that hot.

West,
Very true, it is only about how good you are for that moment. I heard Jennifer getting the diss by the Today show fashionistas. Everybody hated her dress.
Anonymous said…
i really hope jennifer h. doesn't do the whole surgery thing, because people just look weird when they're supposed to have a full body and then don't.

did you see her on barbara walters special beforehand? i like that she's still dating her high school sweetheart... barbara actually said to her, "you know he's a maintenance man in chicago and you're in hollywood, that might not work." i liked her reply, "but why would i date someone who now only knows me as the jennifer hudson in dreamgirls, when he knew me before," and then she was super-cute when she said, "i'm not proposing to him though."

anyway -- now i've forgoten who did win best supporting actor.

kari
Unknown said…
Kari,
That's so rude of Barbara Walters and it also shows the sexism that our society has. Why does the man always have to be more successful in the eyes of society. If he's a good guy, he's a good guy. Haven't they been together a long time? I do wonder why they don't just go ahead and tie the knot.
Anonymous said…
seriously rude or barbara. i mean i understand journalists playing devil's advocate to get a response. but, barbara's tone of voice sounded more like a veteran giving advice to the rookie.

recently, though, i've gotten a kick out of people like barbara walters getting thrown for a loop. there's something fun about seeing the non-reality bubble burst for anyone who come across as "expert" on tv... take for instance joan rivers at the grammies. i thought it was hilarious watching her try to make sense of fashions she couldn't understand.

kari
I didn't watch this year, but I'm glad Forest Whitaker won. I have thought since "The Crying Game" that he was an amazingly gifted and underappreciated actor.

I haven't seen any of the movies yet because we hardly ever go anymore since they'll be on DVD soon enough.

As for the Antichrist... he's much too busy in Washington these days to infiltrate the Academy Awards. Silly girl.
Leili said…
I really like Forest Whitaker's acting in everything I've seen him in, but I have mixed feelings about Last King of Scotland. They were shooting in Uganda at the same time my crew was there shooting another film, and we met some of them briefly in Kampala, so we were psyched about seeing what they had come up with.

There are very few stories coming out in the West about Africa. A lot of these few are seen through the eyes of a white character - I dunno, it gets tiresome and boring. I could write a lot more about it but it's Los Angelista's blog. Just tell us what you think when you've seen it. And prepare yourself for one scene so sickening that it's basically impossible to watch.

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