Los Angelista Is Up And Running!

Welcome to Los Angelista.

If you are like me, you are sitting at your desk, thinking about how cute your kids are, but how much you need a break from them, and how you can possibly rig the $59 million dollar California Lottery to produce a winning ticket just for you. Well, forget about it, because I am going to win that money...and then everyone at my job will try to kiss my ass.

Yes, I'm married. Not to the kind of husband that showers me with jewels and fancy floral arrangements either. I don't think those exist unless you are Vanessa Lane Bryant and your husband has just been busted for allegedly assaulting a young white chick. I don't think I'd want to wear that million dollar ring.

I'm just grateful at this point that my husband showers, period. I admit that I would be incredibly turned on if he ironed his clothes or went and bought himself a nice outfit or two, but I don't think he's dreaming of trolling the racks at Macy's in the way that I am. But I wish he would, for once, decide that he wants to be a hot, desirable pretty boy.

I have two kids. "O" is 3 1/2 and "T' is 10 months. Do you ever wonder if your kids are going to grow up to be hot? I should only be wondering if they are going to grow up and be smart, spiritually minded princes of personality. I do wonder that sort of thing but I'm also wondering if they'll be good looking. Six years into the City of Angeles, it's official. I'm shallow. Los Angeles has infected me.

I'm like you. I want to have my cake and eat it too. (That's a dumb saying, isn't it?). Last month, on a visit home, my mom asked my sister on the sly if I am pregnant. I think she was trying to say that she thinks I'm fat. My mom has lost almost 30 pounds. She's doing the Michael Thurmond 6 Week Body Makeover. I just need to start running.

Even though I live in LA, I don't like Venice Beach. Venice is stupid. I went there on Sunday with the family. My husband just LOVES Venice. I think I might dislike Venice because my current boss and my ex-boss both live there. I think people could have sex on the beach in Venice, in full view of everyone else and people would stare and say, "Wow. Californians are sooo liberal."

Au Revoir Amigos!


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