Comments on Los Angelista's Guide To The Pursuit Of Happiness: Behind the Wall

Anonymous,Thanks for sharing that. It adds a lot ...

2008-06-23T11:34:00.000-07:00

Anonymous,
Thanks for sharing that. It adds a lot of perspective, and my heart goes out to you. I wish folks who are HIV positive would not hide themselves away because it makes it so much easier for our society to act like HIV doesn't exist or doesn't truly affect lives in the way it so clearly does. Then again, I'm not walking in those shoes so who am I to suggest that. I feel guilty because for as long as HIV has been around, I didn't even know that that's common for that to happen. My prayers are with you, anonymous. Stay healthy.

I am a female living with HIV and what your neighb...

2008-06-22T22:28:00.000-07:00

I am a female living with HIV and what your neighbour said about them cutting themselves from everyone holds true. Gay or straight everyone l know that is living with this hides themselves away.

One more thing l know a lot of couples who are still together after the other passed on the virus..It's hard to forgive but easier than being on your own with it.

Jen,To true that this sort of thing gets repeated ...

2008-05-07T14:08:00.000-07:00

Jen,
To true that this sort of thing gets repeated too often. And I have thought about making a book of my observations of LA, and my dear friend, Leili, has suggested to me a couple of times. But I need an expert photographer to help me illustrate it all.

Have you thought of putting these observations abo...

2008-05-06T19:07:00.000-07:00

Have you thought of putting these observations about your neighborhood into a collection of personal essays about L.A.? I think you'd have a hit on your hands.

I feel sad for the couple who lived such a tragic history. There are way too many similar stories out there, and not only from cheating - sometimes the disease just sitting there, ticking away, without a partner knowing.

1969,SO, I took some photos of the whole scene fro...

2008-05-05T17:00:00.000-07:00

1969,
SO, I took some photos of the whole scene from across the street, but I don't have a good one without the street sign on it and so I didn't post it. You never know who's going to mapquest that address and then be hanging out in front of my place. I suppose I could've Photoshopped it off but I felt too lazy to do it. And why IS HIV so off the radar? It shouldn't be.

Houseonahill.org,
I have been writing a LOT lately. It's why I'm so slow responding to comments these days. You're right that forgiveness and love go hand in hand. I feel a little jaded thinking they stayed together for financial reasons.

Heart,
I have been thinking about how I can incorporate the whole thing into something I write in the future. It's really sticking with me. And the fence totally covers up the pool. Such a hideous fence though.

Janie,
I also wish all the walls could come down and people could connect more from their hearts.

Starting over is never easy, no matter when you do it. I'm glad you're holding it together. Taking it one day at a time is all you can do. If you need any help, let me know.

Ian,
It is sad, but these are the things that make life what it is. It's the reality that makes the good things shine that much brighter.

What a sad tale, Liz, at so many levels. Beautiful...

2008-05-05T09:34:00.000-07:00

What a sad tale, Liz, at so many levels. Beautifully and sympathetically told, however.

Hey Liz!It's scary how we let fences/walls and men...

2008-05-04T23:10:00.000-07:00

Hey Liz!

It's scary how we let fences/walls and mendacity keep us from the reality of life. It would be nice if all of the walls could be down and we would want to know what was happening with each other in a way that could be appropriate and not too scary for our children.

Thanks for checking in with me. I and the kids are good. We are taking it one day at a time. I hope to be posting again soon. Lord knows I have enough to talk about! Starting over at 44, with 4 kids is just the beginning! lol

Take care,
Janie

"Good fences make good neighbors." What a sad stor...

2008-05-03T18:45:00.000-07:00

"Good fences make good neighbors."

What a sad story, worthy of a novel at least. I am most concerned that the new people keep their swimming pool inaccessible to children as such things are called "attractive nuisances" in the law.

I loved the images you wove in this story and could even smell the honeysuckle.

The power of forgiveness and the power of love ~So...

2008-05-03T18:06:00.000-07:00

The power of forgiveness and the power of love ~

Something good from out of the bad...

Your storytelling is getting even better...thanks Liz, you know what kind of day we had!

It's amazing that AIDS has faded from the forefron...

2008-05-03T17:47:00.000-07:00

It's amazing that AIDS has faded from the forefront of our disease list only to be replaced by more cosmetic practices like botox and plastic surgery. Now it's all about looking good.

I would love to see photos of that house...AHEM.

The Joy,I think they houses hold energy too. The ...

2008-05-03T17:36:00.000-07:00

The Joy,
I think they houses hold energy too. The guy who had my apartment before me died in here. He was such a nice old guy though, totally cool. I still have one of his rugs and I never have gotten a negative vibe in here. My previous apartment though, that's a whole other story. I hope the new folks will be sweet and inviting, even if they do have bad taste in fences. I can see three guys in the front yard right now. It looks like they might be swimming.

Nick,
I'm really sort of fascinated by the fact that they stayed together. Maybe they'd just been together for so long and really loved each other and so were able to forgive. I don't know. Who knows, it could have been for financial reasons too since the cost of staying healthy once you have HIV isn't cheap.

I really dislike when folks cut down trees. Unless it's a dead tree that might blow down in a storm, just leave it! It IS vandalism!

Jameil,
I wish I knew the whole story of it. I keep thinking about the whole situation. I'm glad I got to see it all too. It was weird though because it was all just so unexpected. I usually come in through the back entrance to our building so whatever's going on in the front sometimes isn't on my radar as quickly.

Phillipe,
It is quite a metaphor, isn't it? We all do have our walls for sure. And we each never really know what goes on behind closed doors. The things I imagined were so far from the truth.

Claudia,
I love talking to my neighbor. She's a great woman and I love to get perspective from her on what this neighborhood has been because all of it, including me, is so relatively new. I'm one of the "old" residents now after less than 10 years.

I really love many of the walled houses here in LA. I suppose I wouldn't mind having one of my own so I can create the walled garden of my imagination.

This is a beautiful piece. I know exactly what yo...

2008-05-03T07:19:00.000-07:00

This is a beautiful piece. I know exactly what you mean about the walled off houses in LA. I always imagine that they are movie stars or, as you said, secret gardens. And some truly are.

Amazing how much we all learn from your old neighbor.

What an interesting metaphor for the American mome...

2008-05-03T05:58:00.000-07:00

What an interesting metaphor for the American moment we are living in. We all have a wall or two we either conceal our true selves behind or build around those we don't want to have to deal with for one reason or another. Funny thing about walls, they keep other people out but they keep you in as well.

wow. you are so thoughtful. i'm glad you at leas...

2008-05-03T02:25:00.000-07:00

wow. you are so thoughtful. i'm glad you at least got to finally see what was behind that wall.

Liz, it's very sad that they felt they had to hide...

2008-05-03T00:38:00.000-07:00

Liz, it's very sad that they felt they had to hide themselves away behind that huge wall and never be seen by anybody. As you say, it's remarkable (remarkably forgiving?) that they stayed together and looked after each other. I don't think I would be so forgiving in that situation. And yes, we don't talk enough about AIDS now, other issues like global warming have become more fashionable.

I thought you were going to say all the trees had been chopped down. Someone's just moved into the house opposite us and the first thing they did was hack down all the lovely mature trees in the front garden. Sheer vandalism.

I think that houses do hold things... Memories and...

2008-05-02T21:08:00.000-07:00

I think that houses do hold things... Memories and unresolved issues. I believe you have to pray about it. It sucks that they decided to put their "white picket fence" up and take down a little piece of the street's personality, but maybe that means they'll be sweet and inviting?